The All Blacks We Are Not...

But we still kicked the shit out of Fribourg on Saturday...We rock.

La Policia

Dude. You know you are too old when the police bust all the punk kids around you...but not you. Good thing? I'm not so sure...

Situation? Barcelona, two weekends ago. Andrea and I are sitting on the steps of a big plaza having a beer and just people watching. Ton of people hanging around, chilling out, etc. Phil/katie, think back to Roma a few years ago. Same kind of vibe. All of a sudden one of these fuckers rolls up, screeches to a halt, like, 2 feet in front of us, and two jackbooted spanish cops rush out of the van and, literally, start fucking everyone's shit up. That is the only way to put it, man. It happened so fast that it was like watching a movie. This big freaky cop, yelling who knows what, RUNS up to these people sitting three feet to our left and proceeds to KICK all their beers over, then STOMP on their beers, and then kick the people. It was so fast, and so violent that we were both just kind of stunned! This group left, obviously. His partner did the same up and down the steps. These cops cleared out a whole plaza of people (there must have been at least 50-60) in about 40 seconds. Except us!! They never even LOOKED at us! I was like, 'we have some amazing magical power whereby we are invisible to angry spanish cops!' That was proven incorrect when I was like, 'buenos noches, senior cerdo and he bit my ear off...Kidding, i'm kidding. Anyway, we watched the carnage, finished our drinks and meandered on, feeling a bit confused. I'm glad we weren't attacked by deranged spanish cops...but another part of us...well...you know. We felt left out :)

Andrea later found out the reason for this insanity. Barcelona is trying to outlaw drinking outside. Brilliant. Take a really vibrant, fun, awesome city and start putting insanely stupid rules everywhere...See example A (New York).

Ben in Fresh Pow-Pow.com

Ok. My camera is shit, and the shutter was half closed, but hey. you get the idea. fresh pow on saturday...

Now THIS is a football quote...From ESPN.com

Shocking statement

January 29, 2008 1:35 PM

Turns out not everyone on the Patriots' offensive line has been able to grow a beard. Right tackle Nick Kaczur, who has more of a bushy goatee, was asked about his two clean-shaven linemates.

"Those guys are still waiting for their balls to drop," said Kaczur.

Told of Kaczur's comment, clean-shaven guard Russ Hochstein said, "For some of these guys it's an artform. I tried as hard as I could, but it didn't come in well. My chin's fine but I really struggled on the sides."

__________

This is how I expect NFL players to talk. antiques. jesus..

Newsflash!

Eli Manning liked to go antique shopping with his mom. And before anyone jumps all over me for being a macho/sexist asshole, I'm sorry. It's SUPERBOWL WEEK. I want to hear about how when Eli was a kid, he used to shoot payton in the balls with a red ryder pellet gun, or, like, ate squirrels or some CRAZY shit like that. Something MEAN, dude. MEAN. You can be sensitive the other 51 weeks a year. For real. It's nice the boy loves his mama. I like my moms too. Shit, i've even gone antique shopping with my mom. So I'm DOWN with Eli in principle, but i'm not a GODDAMN NFL QUARTERBACK in the most violent, aggressive game in the world. You're about to play play Mr. Tom "i'm cold as ice, most unstoppable QB in history, a record-breaking, sick-ass athlete, and, oh by the way, i'm banging Gisele the SUPER MODEL" Brady, you gotta step it up a bit. DAMN.

Fucking Sweet, dude...

I love it. LOVE IT. Why were the only people Smoky Bear could get in 1985 to do public service announcements to tell people to stop burning down our forests are, like, the biggest stoners in the world?? Stoners are KNOWN for setting things on fire by accident, not least of all themselves (which is funny, dude).

Note the extremely un-subtle choice of the Dead tune "Fire on the Mountain" playing in the background while Mickey Hart is rambling on about how 'little fires cause big fires and then the flowers and little animals disappear' and shit...This is so brilliant. I don't know whether this makes me want to punch hippies, or go roll a giant doobie and listen to "Scarlet Begonias". But the problem with the latter is that then I'll fall asleep during Jerry's killer solo from that wicked '76 boot of Dark Star from Red Rocks, and i'll not only immolate myself, but fucking burn my flat down, and half of lausanne with it, thus violating the whole POINT of Smokey Bear and PSAs all at once...Cosmic, no? Hippies! DAMN!

I decided to shave my beard...Here is a Picture.

Dude...DUDE. This site is so awesome. I wish I spoke German. Please, for the love of god, listen to the MP3s on this guy's page. He may be the coolest guy ever. I want to hire this guy to play at my next party...

This is Amazingly Lame...

As some of you know, there used to be this 'battle' as to what was cooler, skiing or snowboarding. It's all pretty irrelevent, 'cause as we all know, snowboarding is for degenerate mongoloids, but I digress. I mean, I guess I could understand back in the 80's when skiiers looked like this babe that you wouldn't want to be associated with the sport. I think i may still have some neon pink goggles somewhere. I know Phil sure does. Keep rocking out on that shit, man... But yes, goofy clothes, goofy skis and rear-entry boots. TOTALLY uncool. But that has all changed in the last decade where skis have taken leaps and bounds over their retarded cousin, the snowboard. First came shaped skis, then freestyle skis, and of course my favorite, big fat off-piste monster skis. The point is, skiing is much cooler, and has evolved tremendsouly. Snowboarding has not. You get more air on skis when you want it, pull way cooler tricks, you don't have to sit in the snow everywhere, and you are far more mobile to go where you like. Case in point. Was riding the tram to the top of Mt. Fort on Saturday. Tons of fresh powder. Not one snowboarder because it was necessary to hike a bit and snowboarders are lazy stoners, as a rule of thumb. Not all of you, but most...


Anyway, I'm finally winnning the war with my snowboarding friends who can't fully be blamed for thinking skiing is uncool because, for a time, it was. And the point of this whole post is really to point your attention to this asshole who, besides being a total dickhead retard, has just set my cause back, like 10 years. I mean, seriously. What is this? 1995? I don't think i've ever seen something just so completely, and entirely, outdated. My god...